With long distance, when you do see each other it’s absolutely amazing because you’ve waited so long and everything feels like a fairy tale when you’re with them again. This is probably her favorite and least favorite part.
It is her favorite part because she hates anger and feels like when you haven’t seen each other in so long and finally reunite, there is nothing to be angry about. It is just pure happiness.
But this fairy tale part is also her least favorite. It is important to her that the relationship doesn’t stay in some sort of fantasy land where every every time you see each other everything else has to stop just because you haven’t seen each other in so long. Life always keeps on moving and that is what makes it so beautiful.
She wants to continue to build her house and she wants you to continue to build yours. When you do visit each other, it as if you are visiting each other‘s houses. You get to admire everything that’s they’ve built while you’ve been away building your own.
Most importantly, that means you do not have to stop construction when the other person is visiting. There is no good time or bad time, there is just time, and what you choose to do with it.
A real relationship should not make you feel like you have too much on your plate. A real relationship helps you with that plate, and when you can’t finish your food, they can help you finish it. The kind of relationship she wants is the real kind.
She wants to bring each other peace. She want to be someone in your life that you can count on, someone that can help you with your stress, and help you with the rain. She wants to be someone that can help you feel the sunshine and she wants the same feeling.
To allow her to give that back to you, is the biggest gift you could give to her. But for her to be able to do that, in real life not just in the fairy tale, she needs you to allow her to show up. Not just when life isn’t busy, but when life is busy. Not just when you don’t have anything going on, but when you do have things going on. And not just when you have time for the fairy tale, but in your real life too.
Because she doesn’t just like you when you have free time. She doesn’t just like you when you are happy. She doesn’t just like you when you take her to nice dinners and show her new things..
She likes you when you simply cook her a petite cup of oatmeal and remember she doesn’t like cinnamon. She likes you when you’re biking around Lake Geneva doing what’s good for you and somehow take 10 seconds to tell her that you read her message. She likes you when you are having a bad day and you trust her enough to tell her that you are having a bad day. She likes you when you cry. With your grandmother, with your mom, with her when you’re walking away from the ferry or at the airport and you think she can’t see you.
She likes you because you are you. She doesn’t need you to be perfect. She doesn’t need you to make time for her every second of the day when she visits. She just wants you, and everything that comes with you, and makes you you. She chooses you for your good and also for your not so good.
She can only hope that one day when you see her not so good, you choose her then too.
Most of all, she wants peace. For herself, for the world, for you, and for everyone else she loves.